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Monday, December 15, 2008
12:21 AM

Better Luck Next Time?


I haven't been this excited about a shoe since those padded leather Js came out in 7th grade. Iraqi television journalist Muntadar al-Zaidi knows how to make his presence felt. Showing the soles of shoes to someone is equivalent to spitting in someone's face in Arab culture. The ultimate fuck yo couch indeed.

When he threw his first shoe Muntadar screamed, "This is a goodbye kiss from the Iraqi people, dog." When he went for Plan B he yelled, "This is for the widows and orphans and all those killed in Iraq." Unfortunately, Bush is a lot quicker than people thought. I guess we should have put the economy in a boot and chunked it at him. We'd be much better off.

If you're wondering why he's so testy, well beyond the whole illegal war thing Muntadar had been kidnapped and beaten by a militia. Coincidentally, when Saddam Hussein's regime was overthrown, Iraqis took off their Forces and beat the Hussein statute to the ground. Now Iraqis are hurling their shoes like missiles at Bush. So much for we'll be greeted as liberators. I will give Bush credit in finding humor in a journalist's attempts to leave a Stacy Adams imprint in his eye socket. If only his quick reflexes and humor weren't overshadowed by his abysmal record.

I've noticed some people have expressed sympathy towards President Bush. Some people believe Supershoes should have showed respect for the leader of the free world. I'm not one of those people.

That leader of the free world started an illegal war under false pretenses and has destabilized a region that was already under immense turmoil. Lives have been lost, people have been displaced, and I myself still worry that one of my relatives will come home in a body bag due to some jackass starting a war that's only benefited the stock portfolio of his second in command.

Lucky for Bush he caused such a severe recession that people won't go rushing to Finish Line to hook Muntadar up with another shoe to throw. I wonder if he'll able to avoid a fate that doesn't involve a toe tag.

The Cynical Ones.
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