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Wednesday, April 15, 2009
4:58 AM

Clear Gone Crazy


I'm afraid of writing this because I don't want my niece to whoop my ass, but I'm not a big fan of Miley Cyrus.

I respect her teeny bopper hustle in the tradition of Tiffany, Debbie Gibson, and even Britney Spears, but yikes, that girl is obnoxious sometimes. Particularly the way she seems to think she actually has enough clout to damage the careers of credible musicians.

To say, "I'm gonna ruin them [Radiohead], I'm gonna tell everyone" on radio made her seem like the annoying brat that all of her critics paint her to be. I don't know what planet she lives on, but girls like her come and go every decade so it's best to enjoy the ride and not piss off enough people to the point you won't even get a positive recap when VH1 summarizes the decade of your relevance.

Radiohead was right in pointing out her sense of entitlement, and hopefully someone her own age let's her know that she needs to stop taking herself so seriously.

I've never heard about Raven throwing a temper tantrum because someone didn't want to meet her?

That being said, Jamie Foxx to me went a little bit over the line in telling Miley to do a sex tape. Sure, that may very well be where she's headed judging from her penchant for posting softcore porn inspired photos on MySpace, but still. Miley is a 16-year-old girl.

Let's not do anything to draw comparisons to R. Kelly.

Edit: He's apologized.

Still, can someone check her?

I imagine neither of her parents will do it because why anger the person who you get to both live vicariously through and profit off of.

We see how well that usually turns out.

Miley, meet your future...if you're lucky. This poor girl.

I like her and want her to win, but she still sounds like if she forgets to take her meds one day it's a wrap on the Magic Kingdom because she's going to blow it up.

I can understand why she might forget what city she's in, but what's with random tour outbursts like, "Thanks Vancouver, you were wonderful. Don’t smoke weed!” or wishing people "Merry Christmas" during their Spring Break?

And then there's "My pu--y was hanging out."

Where has she been? It's been hanging out for like ten years now.

Do her parents love her or do they just see dollar signs?

Kind of Lindsay Lohan's parents. Do I even need to explain her issues?

Poor thing can't even get her movies to theaters now. She's one more bad month away from co-starring with Vivica Fox in Fourteen Can Play The Game.

White people, what's up with ya'll folk? I always get on mine, so I need group participation.

And don't even try to front like there aren't white readers here. I've looked at my staff counter. I don't know any Black people in Romania. I appreciate the love, so love me back by explaining the other color of crazy.

As a peace offering, I'd like to name one white girl who doesn't seem insane: Meghan McCain.

She's the biological child of John McCain yet she still manages to make sense. I can't remember the last time I've used the phrase "make sense" in reference to Republican. Truthfully, I'd even say I would consider voting for her one day, which unintentionally makes me question my own sanity.

Her dad doesn't really strike me as the sanest man around, yet here she is, with a lick of sense going at it with the other loonboons of her party.

What's with all of the others?

The Cynical Ones.
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