Judging from some of the comments I've read in recent months, there are a few readers here who seem to have a problem with 'the ghey.' Being the kind gent I am, instead of being mindful of some people's sensitivities (or prejudices) and avoiding the topic at all cost, I'd rather post pictures like this and cause some to go blind -- or at least cockeyed for an hour or so.
Anyhow, Beyonce has finally landed the cover of Vogue. I don't read Vogue, but I know only the White House and broadcast television best this magazine in the age old American pastime, "Who Wants to Avoid A Negro?" So, two back-to-back Black covers is a big deal, so go you, Beyonce.
Now that we've gotten that out of the way, this post isn't really about her. It's about the kid who clearly stole her shine in the above shot.
Lil' homie is giving it, ain't he? I didn't even notice Beyonce at first. Folks can keep pretending gay people weren't invented until 1996, but there's no way you can convince me that "bitch please, this is my shot" posture isn't innate. Not every gay is that way, but I don't expect this kid to get married to a woman and coach his son's football team -- although he may have tackled a Keri Hilson fan recently.
Here's an excerpt from the article:
As the kids are being put through their paces by a choreographer, Beyoncé makes a surprise entrance in a full-length purple gown. It slowly dawns on them that Beyoncé is standing right in front of them, and their faces are like little contained explosions. One of the only boys, Chris, actually fans his face with his hands as if he is about to faint.
If you're wondering, no I haven't been hanging with Mathew planning revenge against Keri Hilson. I've been busy, jack. I actually planned on a bunch of updates for today and yesterday, but I kept getting sidetracked -- some of it blog related. I finally decided to get a dotcom and in trying to switch over to Wordpress, I've run into a wee bit of problems with the template. I like this layout and I'm hard pressed to keep it as close to this as possible.
So, hopefully within the next couple of days, I'll be pointing you over to the new version of the blog. If it looks a little janky at first, that's ok -- it will get better.
Speaking of which, I hope this stan in the video finds the hug and prescription he's evidently going without. I still think no matter who the song was directed at, R&B beef is pretty corny and doesn't really help an artist in the long run. It certainly doesn't help a newbie to take on argubly the biggest crossover R&B female out and ignite a stan war.
Keri, you seem nice, and you can write a catch hook and carry a tune -- but there's no stoping the voodoo of B-Unit. Buy a clue and file a restraining order against Mr. Grits on Toast.
P.S. If you're going to broadcast from your kitchen, try cleaning it first.
Not that I ever believed her, but for several years now, Beyonce has been talking about wanting to retire at the age of 30 so she can settle down and have some big head babies. I tend to never believe artists when they talk about retiring, though for a second there I worried she might scale back after marrying Jigga. One kid alone could spread those hips wider than the Mississippi -- and we all know our girl loves her some Popeyes. He done a put a ring on it, so the fear that after a two piece of chicken and kids she might up and decide at 29 1/2, "Let Rihanna have it" started to feel real.
Thankfully, Beyonce has come to realize retirement is for quitters.
She told Ebony: “I’ve worked so hard on my craft, and I will never stop. I will never retire. I love it way too much.”
That's right. Don't you ever leave me, Beyonce. I don't know what it's like to live in a world without Beyonce p-poppin' all over it, but that is not a world I want to ever come to learn anyway. Not now. Not ever. Especially now that's she's back to wearing hair that's not straight and blonde.
When she told me she wanted to record a soul album, I was so geeked. When I heard "Work It Out," I fell in love. She looks amazing in this photo. I swear I would run barefoot down MLK to get her the Tuesday special at Popeyes -- two piece for .89 cents. You know what? Fuck it. I would get her the family special. She's that wonderful, which is why sometimes I get disappointed that she doesn't live up to her full potential. I want the soul album she promised me.
Yesterday I was talking to a friend and Beyonce basher who claims I never say anything bad about her. If you read this blog, you know that's not true at all. I've virtually handed her a muzzle, expressed disappointment in her stagmatism both musically and visually, so it's not like I compliment every single thing she does. Me thinks this person doesn't really think this, but I will say this: If you don't like Beyonce even a little bit, something must be wrong with you.
There I've finally said it. I can understand why you may wish she go a little deeper, have a little more substance, or push herself harder, but how can you not like Beyonce at all? Seriously. If you don't like her at all, what's the matter? Have you been treated for this condition, and if so, what did the doctor prescribe? Better taste? I'm intrigued.
I've noticed online - typically from message boards - that Beyonce brings out the insecure little girl in people. Is she the best singer in the world? No. Is she the best dancer in the world? Nah, but I certainly appreciate a good twirker. Is the the best we have in the industry overall? Hell yeah.
She is leap and heads above her peers, and while I hate when people get accolades for being so good because everyone else is so bad, I don't place Beyonce in that category. She would be killing it in any decade.
That is why I am so glad she has no plans of ever leaving me. I want us both to be getting it in our walkers until we're over 100. If that thought makes you queasy, take a Tums. You're not living right.
Stanism aside, how can you not find any redeemable qualities in Beyonce? Yes, she seems to be a part of Dr. Suess' book club, and yeah she's pretty vapid in most interviews. Alright, she acts like she molded and shaped the Earth herself some \times, but a lot of big artists can be described this way. I happen to think most celebrities are pretty boring in general. But as long as you can deliver at your job, I'm good.
Have you watched an awards show without her? I rest my case.
I've heard different theories about why so many can't stand her. Some say you're likely a loser, or you're ugly...maybe a combination a both. When people grip about so many people fawning over her, it usually comes across as some petty high school jealousy. Hey, I ain't have those issues, fam.
So, if you're a hater for any other reason besides Beyonce stealing your stuff (which she seems to do on the regular), explain yourselves.
