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Monday, August 03, 2009
6:37 AM

Marvin Could Help You Forget About Mariah, Marshall


While many people sat back and laughed at Eminem's attempts at ethering Mariah Carey on his latest diss track, "The Warning," my only reaction was to ask the poser what does Dr. Dre taste like.

Seriously, if I had any doubts about his sexuality before this song consider them officially confirmed.

I try not to call anyone gay based on anything anecdotal (publicly anyway), but you can no longer convince me that Marshall hasn't pursed his lips to someone's penis every so often.

As I've written many times before here homophobia is typically rooted in misogyny and for any man to be that visceral against a woman is as suspect as he is disturbing. No man should ever come at a woman that way. Ever. He hates women. It's evident in his lyrical content and his overall behavior. Not to mention his typical targets.

Eminem is praised as some fearless emcee yet the only people he ever targets are the likes of Britney Spears, Christina Aguilera, Jessica Simpson, and Kim Kardashian. You know, those hard asses. It's interesting he can get at them frequently, yet when folks like Styles P. can talk slick his way (via The Source a few years back) he doesn't respond.

He's a coward and if you're a grown man who only goes back-and-forth with teeny tiny women I suggest that you look into sawing your genitals off and donating them to charity.

For all of you who claim Mariah started it, let me know how so, because if memory serves me correctly Eminem has been targeting Mariah for years. Outside of the song "Clown," she's never really discussed him. Eminem, on the other hand, can't seem to keep her name out of his mouth. I imagine 50 Cent's dick is jealous.

At the very beginning of this song we hear Em say, "The only reason I dissed you in the first place is because you denied seeing me."

Really? That's all it takes to for him to explode? No wonder "Obsessed" irritated to the degree it did. Windex sure enough does appear to be his own version of Zest. Why is he so pressed? If someone chooses to publicly acknowledge your relationship with them, get your Lawry's on for a second but quickly keep it moving. If you spend years stuck on it, you look nutty as hell and prove the person right in ducking you and your Snicker's-flavored brain cells.

I so wish his mother hugged him more. That way he wouldn't have the mental maturity of a 12-year-old boy. Or be such a miserable pill popping asshole.

I've never gotten this guy's appeal and I've always thought talk of him having it harder as a white rapper trying to break into a black art form to be a crock. If any black man talked about his mother that way on wax, he'd get more side-eyes than R. Kelly at a Girl Scout's meeting.

Eminem has repeatedly likened all women to whores and constantly raps about raping and killing them. I don't find that appealing, and I imagine if Nas rhymed about murdering Kelis the same way Eminem has about Kim in the past reactions would be different.

It baffles me that more people haven't picked up on this. He is clearly a man with some deep seated issues with women. To the point where most should wonder if he really gets anything out of being with one. People can disregard the question all they like, but trust me, there's a reason why hip-hop overall is so misogynistic and homophobic yet often homoerotic.

Those fools don't really like women, hence them always having the words faggot and phrases like "suck my dick" rolling from their tongues (that get a case of the icks when they're forced to touch women in order to "preserve their manhood).

Speaking of dicks, as far as I'm concerned, Eminem can choke on one the next time he feels compelled to berate any woman in that way.

Obviously, I'm not using homosexuality as an insult; but, I do think it's important we start openly discussing how misogyny factors into homophobia, and point out how a certain type of man hides behind each.

Maybe the song amuses you, but I can't rock with it. There's something incredibly wrong with him, and it's unfortunate despite being on an obvious decline, he still serves as a big influence to impressionable kids out there. As if the world doesn't have enough woman-bashing jackasses as it is.

P.S. I've noticed it's been mainly black women saying, "Well she started it." To that I say, you poor, poor victims of patriarchy and hip-hop. Get some self-worth.


The Cynical Ones.
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