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Tuesday, August 19, 2008
11:33 PM


Mama Mia

 



Earlier today I heard “Make ‘Em Say Uhh” on the radio. I should have taken it as a sign, because while I was preppin’ for a No Limit tribute themed post in lieu of hearing that song, a wonderful person shared a video of Mia X with me hours later. Forget that post – I’m all about talking about the biggest mama Mia now.

I used to love Mia X. I remember back in 9th grade when I exchanged Christmas gifts with some of my friends, besides getting The Player’s Club on tape (thank you, Crystal – wherever you are), a girl named Tyrica bought me Mia X’s Unlady Like.

Outside of a random appearance on the bonus disc of Monica’s After The Storm, I haven’t seen or heard from Mia X in years, which is a shame, because Mia X was a solid female emcee. If you’re a fan of bird anthems like me, check for Mia’s remake of Salt ‘n Pepa’s “I’ll Take Ya Man.” If only the industry were different or Mia would have caught a stomach flu, who knows how things may have turned out for her.

Anyway, watch this video. It is hilarious. I love how seriously she took that rap to “You Know I’m No Good.” You would have thought she was getting paid for that.

And I love the way she explains her computer literacy: “I type slow. All this computer shit. I'm from the old school. Everything is all y'know press and click and paste...I be confused.”

At least she’s being honest unlike some of these other fake celebrity bloggers.

I should put her in touch with my mama, though. She sends me text messages all the time, and last year, she had “Runaway Love” as her ringtone. She’s old school and she got it, Mia. You can get it, too.

At the end of the video, she drops the link to her MySpace. GO! Now. I mean, don’t leave my page -- open another tab and visit.

Forget Khia: Mia X has the best celebrity blog on the internet.

While Khia’s ranting about Janet, JD, and Trina, Mama Mia offers much more engaging subject matter with topics like “I Am Not 48 with 6 Kids” and “So What The Hell Do You Do?”

There's also posts about her breast cancer scare (“The Lump.” ) and troubles with diabetes ("What's Fat?").

Based on reading some of her entries I’ve already added “son of a cock biter” to my lexicon.

Plus, if you’re a fan like me, you’re going to want to add her as a friend and help her solve problems like:


NEED YALL ADVICE ABOUT SOMETHING.MY FRIENDS COUSIN MARRIED THIS GUY LAST YEAR
THEY HAVE A NEW BABY AND A NEW HOME ALL SEEMS PICTURE PERFECT UNTIL BEDTIME SHE
GOES ON TO SAY THAT HE HAS BEEN TRYING TO FUCK HER IN THE ASS EVERYTIME THEY DO
IT AND WHEN SHE TELLS HIM HELL NO HE DOES THE OLE IM SORRY WAS IT THAT HOLE AND
LAUGHS. SHE SAID THAT THEIR SEX LIFE WAS ALWAYS GOOD BUT RECENTLY IT HASNT BEEN
GOING DOWN BUT MAYBE TWICE A MONTH AND WHEN IT DOES HE ALWAYS WANTS HER FROM
BEHIND. ME PERSONALLY IM NEVER MAD AT DOGGYSTLYE BUT I ALSO UNDERSTAND THE NEED
TO LOOK INTO EACH OTHERS EYES WHILE TALKING EITHER THAT DIRTY OR LOVEY DOVEY
SHIT THE KISSING AND THE WHOLE NINE SO I CAN RESPECT HER FOR WANTING ALL
OF THAT TO.


Now she says this is her “friend,” but you know how that goes. Look at one of the comments she leaves in the entry:

Thank you but she is very well put together and requires minimal beauty tips sista is BAD she doesnt mind sex head and whatever she is just not down with letting him fuck her in the ass and thats his intentions i know she loves her husband but she doesnt want him in the brown round

Sounds like this “friend” don’t care if the party don’t stop.

Speaking of friends, Mia spoke on of hers:


ONE OF MY FRIENDS SAID I SHOULD CHANGE MY PROFILE PIC BECAUSE HE DETECTED
FAINT HAIRS ABOVE MY LIP. I SAID MAYBE I GOT IT FROM MY DADDY.


How can you not love her?

She also targets hating ass bloggers, so before anyone suggests otherwise, I am not clowning Mia X. Trust me: I am being entertained.

I’m trying to help her get a little more shine.

With that said, go add her as your friend. I want her to get a reality show. I love you, Mia!

The Cynical Ones.
posted by Michael at