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Saturday, February 21, 2009
5:17 PM

Don't It Always Seem To Go


Forgive me if this is old news, but as I write about entertainment stories for lunch money, I decided to multi-task (or procrastinate, I suppose) and try and catch up with Making the Band on DVR. Trust me, it wasn't me who set the timer for this. I forgot this show even still came on. Though I enjoyed watching when Danity Kane was on it, last time I checked, that group was a wrap and thus my interest in the show followed suit.

But as I conclude the season premiere I'm noticing one thing: Danity Kane is all these jackasses talk about. And by jackasses, I mean people who really have nothing to do with the situation. I'm looking at you in particular, Que. Que is someone I want to embrace due to our shared weight class and teeth size, but if Chris Brown has taught me anything it's that all big rabbit teeth people are not created equal.

Why is Que so damn obsessed with Aubrey? Does she owe him money? Did she give him the burn? Haha, wait, Que doesn't really want any of that. I don't care how many times he kisses up on Dawn.

Seriously, though, why is he so pressed? If you could summarize him in one word based on the premiere it would be "Aubrey." Aubrey did this, Aubrey did that. Aubrey ruined Danity Kane, Aubrey has such an ego. Blah, blah, blah. Dude, get off. I seriously doubt Aubrey is thinking about him.

I caught the comment he made about Aubrey posing nude -- insinuating that antics like that tarnished Danity Kane's image. Yeah, because the roster over at Bad Boy has always been a bastion of morality. It's funny he takes swipes at her for doing that, yet she made $500,000 for that ego booster. That's money I'm almost certain none of the members of Day 26 will ever see. It's likely more than Danity Kane would have ever seen had they stayed together. A platinum album split five ways on a Bad Boy contract sounds like it's just enough to put you back in line for food stamps.

I laughed when I heard one of them (yeah, I don't remember their names right now...oh well) say the members of Danity Kane should be millionaires. These guys do realize they're on Bad Boy, right? If not, I need them to latch off Diddy Puff's sac for a minute and go holler at Cherri Dennis, Black Rob, G-Dep, the lost girls of Total, and Jerome. Or stop by the 116th station and ask Dylan how those Bad Boy residuals are treating him.

As for the previews of the season, it looks like it will be another season of bitch fits, Puffy applauding himself and using the show to cross promote his products, a couple of boomkats, and Dawn pretending she doesn't really want to be a solo artist. All while we forget Donnie Klang is still a cast member. Ya'll let me know how that goes. In the meantime I'll be waiting for Aubrey's next reality show. Hopefully she brings along D. Woods. You truly don't know what you got 'til it's gone.

The Cynical Ones.
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