If he weren't possibly the worst President in history, George W. Bush might actually be likable. Of course, I only mean that in a funny drunk sort of way. He's the type of person that would make you laugh at the bar and give police someone else to watch for the night. Double your pleasure.
That type of person shouldn't be President, though. For everyone that voted based on the premise that you wanted to say that you could see yourself having a beer with your elected leader, take a good long look at what that logic leads to. Yeah, you could meet this clown at the bar for a beer, but you had to sell your sperm and eggs to buy enough gas to get there. Not to mention sooner rather than later, you'll probably be getting in knife fights over the last bag of rice at Costco. And most people from Europe and China are likely spit on you if you try to give them American dollars.
I still consider myself to be a part of Team Rih-Rih, but she's starting to get on my nerves again.
The Umbrella singer - who is rumoured to be dating R’n'B star Chris Brown - admits she enjoys spicing up her sex life by wearing her often revealing and provocative costumes at home.
She said:“I like to push the envelope sometimes. It depends on the mood and the occasion. It’s always fun to take some home. Sometimes I get to do that.”
That statement is as contrived as the career-changing haircut her A&R rep suggested.
She's adamant about forcing this "bad girl" image down our throats. Sorry, Rihanna: You "date" a dude that looks like he still goes to recess in the middle of the day. Sit down.
But you know what? I get it. You're edgy. You're innovative. You're a trend setter. Go you.
Happy now?
I think that's great that she embraces her inner S&M freak, but when are people going to ask her some serious questions like:
1. Have you learned how to dance yet?
2. Are you working on how to not sound like a goat when you sing?
3. What are you doing to make sure that in five years some younger, prettier, freakier chick with less shame and vocal talent than you comes out and tries to send you back on a boat to Barbados?
Or better yet, why do you refuse to release "Breakin' Dishes?" Why has your label instead opted for this generic "Disturbia" instead? Have ya'll heard it? So mad at the 'bum bum be dome' shit she's doing. Sounds like something Scooby and the Gang runs to.
Xenophobes everywhere rejoice: You've scored yet another win in the ongoing battle to demonize anything your intolerant, paranoid, flat out ignorant heart desires to!
To the average person, there's nothing remotely disturbing about Rachel Ray's attire in a recent ad shot for Dunkin Donuts. However, to conservative writers like Michelle Malkin, Rachel Ray is donning the scarf of an American hating jihadists.
The keffiyeh, for the clueless, is the traditional scarf of Arab men that has come to symbolize murderous Palestinian jihad.
For those of you who don't know who Michelle Malkin is (lucky you), she is an Asian woman who wrote a book defending the racial profiling that produced the Japanese internment camps launched in World War II as well as championing the current profiling now targeting Arab and Muslim Americans. That being said, it's not actually surprising that she can defend prejudice -- even when she herself is a victim of it.
Still, one can't help but ask: Don't people like her have something better to do? Or better yet, why did Dunkin Donuts cave into the pressure of a bigot?
‘In a recent online ad, Rachael Ray is wearing a black-and-white silk scarf with a paisley design. It was selected by her stylist for the advertising shoot. Absolutely no symbolism was intended. However, given the possibility of misperception, we are no longer using the commercial.’’
Instead of ignoring her and giving her some indication that she really needs to get a glazed clue, the suits instead opt to give her the idea that she was in the right. Way to go, Dunkin Donuts!
It's refreshing to see an American company show sensitivity to the concerns of Americans opposed to Islamic jihad and its apologists. Too many of them bend over backwards in the direction of anti-American political correctness....
Fashion statements may seem insignificant, but when they lead to the mainstreaming of violence -- unintentionally or not -- they matter. Ignorance is no longer an excuse. In post-9/11 America, vigilance must never go out of style.
If she's so pressed about this scarf, why doesn't she go after the other possible jihadists?
Like John McCain's daughter. Let's see Michelle go after her. What about the American troops? I've seen a few of them wearing them. Are they terrorist sympathizers, too?
The stupidity and paranoia of some Americans knows no bounds. I imagine bananas, duck duck goose, and Plato are all next.
If you didn't know already, Solange's ex-husband now raps. Taking on the moniker of Yung Sosa, the former brother-in-law of Beyonce has his own album due at the end of the year.
In the video they refer to Yung Sosa as "The Nas of the South." If you're wondering, no I don't really know what that means either. I imagine it doesn't mean he has multiple personality order, so I gather it suggests he's like...'deep?'
The South's answer to O.D.B. sounds more fun to me.
Anyway, I'm not going to comment either way for once (Indeed miracles do happen, ya'll). That's mainly attributed to me remembering Yung Sosa as Daniel before he knocked up the other Knowles sister. With that being said, you can listen to Daniel's Yung Sosa's track and judge it on your own.
I have seven words for the cast, crew, production company, and network behind the updated version of 90210: Saved By The Bell: The New Class.
It's nice to see Tristan Wilds get some work after his work on The Wire, but portraying the bad black kid that gets adopted by the nice wealthy white family: Yawn.
And Michelle Tanner's auntie playing the mom that's "as cool as the kids:" MILF, please. Poor Becky.
Then there's the narrator proclaiming, "The New 90210: Cooler, sexier, more provocative. Where every story is intriguing and every character has a secret. And nothing is what you expect." Yeah, whatever. Uh huh. That's what they all say.
It will be the same old tired story lines only with more underage sex and without Brenda Walsh again. Not to mention more drug references, pregnancy scares, bouts with bulimia, and girl-on-girl action if the censors let them get away with it. Oh wait, there's a younger male teacher, too. Expect him to push up on a student. Male or female? Well, I guess we'll just have to tune in to find out, won't he?
This show looks like a knockoff version of the OC which is a knockoff of the original 90210. I thought The Hills killed all of these shows off two or three years ago anyway? Do we really need another show dedicated to spoiled, pampered, horny, rich white kids with no real problems? Haven't we reached our quota for these teen dramas for the next 25 years already?
What happened to shows with Black people in them? We all don't live near Tyler Perry, y'know. And we're not all in jail either. You want to bring a show back? Bring back 227! That building may be gentrified by now, so the cast of Frasier lives there now but ya'll know what I'm saying.
I feel sorry for all of these poor suckers ready to sign their life and piece away for four and three quarter seconds of fame. And by fame, I mean making the top 100 YouTube videos list on a slow Tuesday. I understand that people have dreams, but these people should ask themselves this: Do I really want to end up like Raz-B?
Or better yet really stop and think about what success means to Chris Stokes.
Then take a moment and consider the source of all “fame and fortune” courtesy of a career with TUG Entertainment.
Oh and don’t you forget the aftermath.
Good luck contestants. I can’t wait to not see you in House Party 7: R. Kelly’s Costume Ball.
So this is what it sounds like when puberty skips you over and weed takes the place of your vocal coach. No wonder he bothers to only whisper and talk-sing his way through his corny tracks these days. Can you believe people are actually applauding him for this? I guess you have to treat botched renditions of the national anthem performed at sporting events the same way you respond to the tone deaf, no talent girl addicted to Newports getting a solo at church. It’s like you know Jesus is grabbing his ear plugs, but you have to bear through it without bursting into laughter or booing.
In the future, the only thing Ray-J should be allowed to cover is a woman with no shame.
If a lesbian and a Republican can have a civil debate about gay marriage without using the terms "bigot" or "Godless adulterer" certainly there's hope for us all, right?
Maybe?
Possibly?
C'mon nah, have faith.
Anyway, my second piece has run on Newsone.com. It's my take on the controversial ruling by the California Supreme Court overturning the ban on gay marriage. Personally, I think everyone has the right to marry and later divorce anyone they want regardless of your sexual orientation.
Whether or not you agree with that, you should still read it. No really, you ought to. Read it, try not to call me any bad names, then send mass emails, all that.
It’s official: Usher has Mary J. Blige disease. All the signs were there. It started with the constant clamoring about how in love he was and how happy he finds himself because of it. Then the nuptials came, followed by the declaration that he is a brand new person. On a personal level, it’s pretty commendable. Musically, it makes for pretty dull and repetitive compositions.
Here I Stand, Usher’s fifth studio album and follow-up to the diamond-certified Confessions, could easily be called The Power of Starkist (think about it for a little while, you'll get it) or Tranny Love. One listen to this album and you realize that new wife Tameka Foster-Raymond must have the Midas touch or one hell of a hookup with a voodoo priestess.
Yes, she’s that bad – or at least that’s what Usher would have you believe. Although he reminds you throughout the album that he still faces hurdles as he approaches a new phase in life, he reminds you even more that he’s dedicated to staying true to his new life as a husband and a father. As the album drags along, one can’t help but think: “Ok. We get it already.”
In many respects, Here I Stand is still your typical Usher album. Many of the themes presented on this album have been constants in Usher’s ten-year-plus career for some time now. The difference between those works and ones found on this new album are that the singer behind them now comes across as a tamed version of his former self – therein laying the problem. When you’re an entertainer, tamed is never the adjective you want used to describe you.
Though he tries his best to put on airs to ease fears that he’s no longer like the rest of us with the first single, “Love In This Club,” it’s pretty clear Usher’s subject matter is different from here on out. He can talk about making love in the club all he wants, but “Best Thing,” featuring another now oomph-less artist these days, Jay-Z, gives us a good idea of what he’s really doing these days. On the track, Usher boasts, “No matter trickin’ and kissing miscellaneous chicks, acting like a jerk, woman, I’ve been to church.” While it’s nice to see him in the pews, if he’s that pressed about delivering sermons on the power of love on every song, he can kiss his spot on my iPod goodbye.
Although Here I Stand takes a detour from the route that produced the celebrated Confessions, the album is not a sign that a married Usher is now permanently incapable of making quality music. Songs like “Trading Places” and “This Ain’t Sex” offer some indication that Usher can still appease the appetite of his listeners who have yet to match his glee. Usher will simply have to take some time to strike a proper balance between the fun of his past and the new responsibilities he welcomes in his future. Hopefully, someone lets him know he doesn’t have to be so preachy, and pass along word that it’s ok for him to still have a little fun. That or Tameka needs to pulls back the whip.
There is a child roaming this Earth named Jodeci, and surprise: He’s already running into legal trouble. Don’t ask me how I know this, but trust me when I say this is not a joke. Now do you see why I start so many blog posts about the importance of not naming your child something crazy? What options does a boy named Jodeci have? He has no choice but to be a rapper or singer because to HR, the name Jodeci screams he probably spilled ‘rnge soda all over his resume. That and fish grease.
Don’t get me wrong, I love me some Jodeci, but I wouldn’t name my kid after them. “Let’s Go Through The Motions” wasn’t that hot, was it? You couldn’t name that fool Dalvin? Stay or Feenin’ are even better names than Jodeci! I’m sorry if this sounds cruel, but some people need to be spayed.
To top it off, when I told one of my friends this, after I convinced her that I wasn’t lying, she informed me that a third grade teacher told her that she has a child named Dafinest. Da what?! What’s next? Da Coolest N’gga? I need people to stop drinking around their child’s birth certificates!
I pray for the teacher that has little Jodeci, Beyonce-Ashanti, Keyblige, and Dafinest all in one classroom.
Geraldine Ferraro is a bitter, delusional, self-important peon that cries victim hood while playing dumb about her privilege in this country. Naturally, that makes her a frequent guest on the Fox News network. After embarrassing herself months ago for running off at the mouth that she's not racist, and that she's done things for "them," Geraldine is back at it.
What's she whining about now? SEXISM! C'mon: What else does her silly self have to talk about? In lieu of recent reports that a certain faction of Hillary Clinton supporters have vowed to campaign against Barack Obama in the fall, Geraldine is not missing the opportunity to brand the Obama campaign as sexist. But she doesn't stop there. Now Black journalists are sexists (and probably racist in her eyes, too) for their coverage of reality (the fall of Hillary Clinton).
I am really sick and tired of people crying sexism in reference to Hillary Clinton. First off, Hillary Clinton is an Ivy League educated white woman from an upper middle class background. Since when did that become the new illegal immigrant or Black child living in a single parent home in the worst part of the city?
On top of that, for all of her "30 years of experience," much of it has to do with her connections to her husband. Yes, she made the choice to leave her legal career in D.C. to help Bill get into politics in Arkansas. And people are right in noting that for a very long time, she made the bulk of their income. She deserves praise for her sacrifices. Still, as far as her political career goes, she would be nothing without Bill, so why is exactly is she some heroine to some feminists? Why not someone like Condoleezza Rice, Kay Bailey Hutchinson, or Claire McCaskill? Those women have done well in politics and as far as I know, they didn't get by because of their husbands.
Anyway, this bitter fallen politician that was nothing more than a token on a presidential ticket twenty years ago herself thinks any criticism of Hillary equates a misogynistic attitude. Y'know, any reference to Hillary's pandering to rural voters that she's just some old gun toting, beer drinking, regular "girl": That means your sexist. If you point out that she's a liar, you hate women. And blah, blah, blah she goes.
What about Hillary purposely saying Obama isn't Muslim "as far as she knows?" Or what about her dismissing the results of the Louisiana primary as nothing more than the Black community displaying pride for their fellow colored? Oh, that was nothing to her. Probably because Geraldine has dismissed every Black candidate with some moderate level of success in a presidential primary (all two of them) as nothing more than a token getting by thanks to the Black vote.
That's all acceptable and not racist, but any criticism of Hillary suggests you're Ike Turner. Please put a muzzle on this old bird. Wait. Is that sexist, too?
Hillary's been playing it both ways this entire campaign, and the reason why she's losing as nothing to do with being a woman. I honestly think she could take Obama out with one punch, so it's not an issue of "toughness." She just ran a poor campaign. It's not Barack Obama or the media's fault that on the day she declared her candidacy, she sat in a chair acting as if she were being crowned the Queen of the USA while Obama's people were out in Iowa telling folks they don't have to live half of their lives with a Bush or Clinton as president.
I'm tired of undeclared racists like Geraldine Ferraro acting as if there's this huge double standard about race and gender when in fact at the end of the day people that look like her have it a whole lot easier than people that look like me and Barack Obama. Barack Obama has faced hurdles over his race and rumors about his religion (which is a separate issue in itself). Hillary Clinton won't be the nominee because people don't believe her. Her bad.
Notice Geraldine can talk about Obama's surrogates being sexist, but she won't speak on women choosing to actively campaign against him to help John McCain. Last time I checked, McCain voted against the equal pay for women bill and is pro-life, so why would women want him to be President?
People like Geraldine irk the hell out of me . If a Big Black man fresh out of jail from a bogus sentence walked into her and knocked her silly ass to the ground, only to be stepped over by a short overweight Mexican woman late for 12 cents an hour job, I'd smile all week.
I wouldn’t be surprised if some of Michelle’s nicknames were along the lines of “Goosey Lucy”, or maybe “Mabel” or “Ms. Tubman.” There’s something about her that screams old lady soul. No, there’s nothing wrong with that. I mean, I like Betty Wright. “Uh uh…pure loving. Said I like that sugar. Uh. Uh. Uh. Pure loving, there’s nothing phony about it.” Whew. Sorry for the random outburst, but that’s my stuff, ya’ll.
Anyway, Michelle has decided to opt out of the gospel genre because heathens sell more ringtones. Her first foray into the sounds of hedonism is “We Break The Dawn.” Though some worried about Michelle’s choice to go for a more secular sound, this song comes across as less like hell’s theme song and more like something aimed at the teeny boppers that make up the base for TRL and Disney Radio.
It’s OK, I guess. It’s not something I’ll be jiggin’, too, though. Still, I really like Goose Luce because she makes the effort. This video looks like its budget costs about as much as a General Tso’s Chicken lunch special, but she made the most of it. That’s the difference between someone who really wants it (Tub Tub) and someone who doesn’t (Kelly!).
She looks pretty, and from the looks of it, she seems to be enjoying herself feeling that man up and getting the Beyonce treatment on the red carpet. I’m not even mad at them tossing her around like a Ms. Kelly album while she struts on you, hoes. Go ‘head Mabel. Shake it like a Geritol bottle!
“Bust It Babies,” “Smell Your Dick,” and Pretty Ricky tunes aside: I still have hope (albeit declining) for the chirren of our future.
Though you can’t always tell there are indeed people who can still actually sing on key. That’s right, without the assistance of a vocoder, autotunes, and background singers doing all the work for them -- they still exist.
Naturally, none of them are allowed to drink legally, so one can only hope the industry doesn’t destroy them by the time they can. Make a note of Lindsay Lohan’s career.
Anyway, here are a few minors I don’t hate!
If you’re not familiar, this is JoJo. To be honest, when I first saw her on TRL (I know: I forgot all about that show, too) a couple of years ago, I didn’t think much of her. Not that she couldn’t sing or anything. It’s just that she was like 12 to me, and yeah, I didn’t really care.
But, a friend put me on to her in the funniest of ways, and after being sent some songs (Memo to the RIAA: It was so “legal”), I became a fan.
What I like about her is that she doesn’t think she should be praised every other second for being able to sing well. And, she’s not nasty towards other singers who sell more albums or get larger praise than she does. If you’re wondering, yes, I’m talking about Christina Aguilera. I used to be a big fan of hers, but she irks me to no end now. I can see exactly why people walked off the dance floor at prom the second her single started playing.
Back to JoJo. Now that she has the legal right not to vote for Hillary Clinton, I’m looking forward to more mature material. I’m a huge Teena Marie fan, and while no one will ever be able to replace her, maybe I can at least have a new Christina Aguilera – just as long as JoJo doesn’t start ending every line with “HA!” during live performances.
If you ever get a chance, you should download “Butterflies” and “Do Whatcha Gotta Do.”
Yeah, I said it. Say something.
I’m a little concerned that one of the few songs on radio with the slightest bit of depth comes from a 16-year-old girl. From the looks of it, Karina Pasian seems like a talented, sweet, nice young lady (Oh I’m getting old). That’s why I fear her label will try to stick in her stilettos before the end of the year. As much as I love her, not everyone has to be Beyonce.
While I’m at it, they don’t have to be Alicia Keys either, which is what I suspect her handlers are marketing her as. No Alicia stans, that’s not a diss to Alicia. I’m just saying, Brandy, Monica, and Aaliyah all had their little thing going, so let’s not be so clone happy is all.
Then there’s Tiffany Evans, who I spotlighted a few weeks ago. Yes, I’m still happy she was singing about a promise ring and not child support.
I don’t know where this girl is, but I hope her career hasn’t already peaked. Please, someone sign her, and please refrain from passing her off to Akon, Polow, and T-Pain. Nothing personal, but voices like that deserve to be heard, not drowned out from overproduced club anthems and 16 bars from whatever rapper they could find around the corner.
It kind of makes me sad to realize that if Ella Fitzgerald and Billie Holiday were born in my generation, they wouldn’t get anywhere near the charts unless they were able to drop down low and sweep the flow with it.
I wish I had watched this show at the time Paris was on. I would’ve actually grabbed somebody else’s cell phone and texted in a couple dozen votes for her.
Anyhow, there you go. Just a few examples of the potential still left in music. Maybe it will take a dozen more flops for the industry heads to realize that people might actually want to buy something (albeit perhaps not in the traditional medium) if so many artists dropping didn’t come across as third-tier versions of acts we were already sick of six months ago.
Never say I don't love the kids! And if you're going to get on me for clowning Lil' Mama and Teyana Taylor, I mean c'mon, have you seen the way they dress. Can you blame me?
I'm starting to feel bad for the Clinton campaign -- well Chelsea anyway. Look at her speaking at Shady Pines. From the looks of these people they look bored out of their minds. Like they can't wait for her to wrap it up so they can go play in their medicine cabinet. My friend told me they look more like they're saying, "That's not my granddaughter! They tricked us! I'm going back to my rocker!" Sounds about right. Thank you, S. Lake.
I wonder where she's going.
I know she's out there.
75,000 people hopped - including those on their boats - came to listen to Obama speak. It's exciting, yet kind of eerie, no?
Everyone with a clue knows that it's been over, no matter how hard they try to convince us (and themselves) otherwise. She'll probably win Kentucky tomorrow, but if I were Hillary Clinton, I would've showed up as this rally with a cup. She knows she needs the money.
This is Greg the Barber. If you haven’t heard, Greg has become the subject of internet folklore after he reportedly knocked Suge Knight out at a club recently. Despite getting jumped by Suge’s folk, Greg reportedly channeled Donnie McClurkin and Ike Turner and put Suge on his back.
Now I understand that being hailed as the real life Craig for doing the unthinkable (knocking Suge Knight down) must be pretty surreal, but am I the only one watching this video thinking, “They shootin' --- Ahh, made you look?”
Better yet: “I see red people.” I hope he has some FBI connect or something, because Suge Knight doesn’t strike me as the type to let public humiliation go easily.
If you look towards the end of the video, you see homie’s wrists need crutches, but since he can obviously pack a punch, maybe he isn’t worried. That or the skull on his shirt shoots hollow-point bullets.
Don’t be surprised if we find out that Greg sent Suge Knight a card apologizing for “accidentally running his first into Mr. Knight’s face.” Then again, he seems to be enjoying the attention, so maybe he’s not scared.
Good luck on trying to land a VH1 reality show out of this whole thing, pimpin’. He’s already been offered a PPV match against Suge Knight set for New Years Eve. Yes, I’m serious. Don’t even try to act surprised.
That is me and the ever beautiful and talented Queen-to-Be herself, Charreah at graduation this time last year. It’s been a year, and with that in mind, I’d like to wish everyone graduating this month (and yes, even you late people with the quarter system) congratulations.
My fellow Bison graduated a week ago, and today, a number of good friends at other schools across the country are chunking the deuce to their respective colleges.
Up until I got closer to the actual moment, the idea of graduating from college wasn’t a big deal to me. I was frustrated with the entire process, and felt it was more or less what I was supposed to do to get where I wanted to be.
Then one of my friends, who graduated today, gave me some perspective and made me appreciate the great accomplishment graduating from college is. Shout out to the Howard graduates, and to those from Morgan State, Hofstra, Penn State, Amherst, Northwestern, Texas Southern, Prairie View, and the University of Houston.
Some of my friends who are graduating today or who have graduated already, have been through far worse than anything I’ve encountered. Suffered losses I can’t imagine, and tackled illness and other burdens that might have made weaker people give up. Plus, some schools try to hold you down, and that can be pressure enough in itself.
So with all of this sentimental crap in mind, I want to say congrats again to the Class of 2008 -- especially to one graduate in particular. Smile...or try to not throw up. I’m extremely proud of all of my friends, and I wish everyone well.
As you know, I ain’t no punk bitch, so don’t go thinking I’m like sweet or anything.
Mind you that we’re in a recession, so as tempting as it is, avoid the ho stroll. Believe me, there are times I still think about buying some go get 'um dunks, a freak'um tee and try my luck in basketball shorts and no inhibitions. But that’s not the way to live.
If you’re into chicks that smile when you call them a bitch, would rather eat a #4 with a strawberry soda than some saddity restaurant like The Olive Garden, and don’t tolerate the bullshit, you’re in luck. Dallas’ own Traidmark has given you yet another song in celebration of a down ass chick. It’s called “Gotta Gutta Bitch.”
Ladies: Are you feeling all warm inside yet?
Just when you think there are already nine million songs on the exact same subject already out, somebody decides to drop nine million + one in case anyone has grown tired of all the other songs that repeat virtually the same lines. Why do so many people treat innovation like herpes?
For anyone that can't listen right now, here's a portion of the lyrics:
SASSY AND SHE CLASSY, FLY AND SHE FLASH IT GUTTA, DATS MY GUTTA BITCH, BADD AND SHE NASTY DONT BE BEEFIN WIT ME, SHE SAY YOU BEEFIN WIT HER YOU SAY YOU BRAWLIN WITH ME, DEN SHE BE BEATIN YOU UP PLUS SHE AINT SCARED OF NOTHIN, RIDIN AND SHE BUSTIN, FIGHTIN AND WE FUSSIN BUT WE ENDIN UP FUCKIN SHE GUTTA AND I LOVE HER, BREAK BREAD GOT HER COVERED, THATS A BET LIKE A BROTHER, SAME SEX SAME COLOR, SHE BADD AS SHE WANNA BE, AND THATS REAL TALK, AND I CAN TELL YOU WHAT SHE GONNA BE, DOWN FOR HER NIGGA MONEY OVER BITCHES, SHE GOT ME BREAKIN ALL THE RULES, BALLIN OUT FOR HER ASS, MY NIGGAS TELL ME IMMA FOOL, DONT TRIP, NOT AT ALL CUZ MONEY AINT A THANG, SHE BREAKING BREAD TOO, AND HER FRIENDS SAY THE SAME, PLUS SHE HATE SUCKIN DICK BUT SHE DO IT FOR ME, EXPECTING NOTHING IN RETURN, BOA SHE REAL AS CAN BE
Alright, fess up: Which one of ya’ll is ready to toss out your birth control the second someone spits this to you at the Chinese food/BBQ/sandwich shop/pizza parlor/burger joint (this is all one place)? Wait, that snobs snobby. Add bank, revival, and library to that.
Judging from the comments on CHiNA’s imeem page, there are quite a few already.
Bunny said: “this song tite den a biitch.”
Mani wrote: “THIS MY SONG! MY GUTTA BITCH IS MY BOYFRIEND. LOL”
That’s some equal opportunity gutta bitchin’ right there, ya dig?
Tristian is geeked: "already Traidmark reppin that dtown, lone star state, home of tha gutta bitches!!!”
Homechick needs to speak for herself.
And SHUNT3I is so happy about the song, she’s speaking some new language: “Di$Z $HyT q0 HARD.......iiM $T3V3N B.K.A lil TRACy iiM Hii$Z qUTTA CHiCC 4lyF3”
I think my contact just popped out of my eye in disgust.
Well that’s their opinion, what’s yours? Personally, it doesn’t come with a dance, so I can’t really take it seriously. I think I’ll stick to Biggie’s take on this.
I like Fantasia. She seems like a nice and genuine person. I was happy when she won American Idol, and I had hopes that she would manage to become a legitimate R&B star. She may not be a classic beauty, but her looks, personality and her voice are all unique, thus making her who she is – and that’s pretty beautiful in the grand scheme of things.
OK, whatever.
Having said that, what the hell is wrong with her? Perhaps I’m living under Fraggle Rock, but I forgot American Idol still came on, so I’ve been a little late in responding to this.
Since when did American Idol become Shug Avery’s Juke Joint? And just who exactly gave her the number to Big Red’s beautician? Whoever is responsible for sending Fantasia her way, I rebuke their SIM card. Oh, and the velvet ensemble: God be some cotton. That is not sessy, ‘Tasia. That’s the anti-sessy.
Alright, forget all of that superficial stuff, because I’m sure there are people out there who love both Koolaid and velvet and think Fantasia looks good. Let’s get to what really counts: her voice.
Why does she sound like that?
I’ve noticed from some of the responses around the internet(s) that some people actually enjoyed her performance, but I don’t know them like that to ask if they’re masochists. That’s a whole lot of screaming going on. I haven’t heard screaming like that since CPS tried to take some trifling’s mama’s child away. Whatever happened to the Fantasia who performed “Summertime” with such finesse? Did the Koolaid man who inspired that hairstyle eat her?
Fantasia is twirling around dancing like somebody’s frisky Aunt Girdy, and screaming like she’s on the set of Saw 18. No wonder Simon looked at her like she was crazy. This isn’t a preview of the future, is it?
Can you tell the difference between these sandwiches?
The sandwich, which has a suggested retail price of $2.89, comes on plain steamed bun, with butter and two pickles as its sole condiments.
You shouldn't be able to. It's the same damn sandwich. No offense McDonalds, but can Chick-fil-A live?
McDonalds addition of the chicken sandwich and biscuits is a strategic move to challenge Chick-Fil-A.
Tony Raffa and Frank Phalen, two McDonalds franchisees in the greater Atlanta area, devised the Southern-style chicken breakfast menu. The two saw the need to compete with the dynasty of Atlanta-based Chick-fil-A, which boasted $2.64 billion in sales last year.
On top of that, they have the nerve to charge more than Chick-fil-A for their rip off.
Customers who buy a large or medium drink today at any McDonald's in the United States can get a free, full-size Southern-style chicken biscuit or chicken sandwich. The company expects to give away 8 million sandwiches and biscuits in the sampling event, running from 7 a.m. to 7 p.m.
Ya'll have at it. As both a closet fat boy and loyal Chick-fil-A supporter, I cannot condone this swagger jacking. I'll be going to Chick-fil-A tonight. Chicken sandwich on wheat with provolone cheese (Yes: I know I got it from you, Ban.). Probably another sandwich and/or some nuggets, too. Don't judge me. Holla.
Take a good long look at these pictures and ask yourself, “Why haven’t I started hanging out at NBA locker rooms?”
Seriously, Kim: Why haven’t you? Do you really want to keep going to the press championing the special love you and Diddy Puff share? I don’t hear Mase still talking about it, so why should you?
You seem like a very nice lady when you aren’t trying to nitpick at people who try to say you should move one from America’s one-man sperm bank.
Now on to Cassie. As you know, I think she’s very pretty, but I’m tired of very pretty people devoid of personality beat my eardrums into submission. She cannot sing. She cannot dance. She can’t even walk and maintain a level of interest from people. Maybe on the catwalk she’s alright, but I’m tired of models and/or strippers pretending to be entertainers. If you entertain Puff Puff Diddy, that’s cool. But that doesn’t mean we’re all getting the same treatment – as if some of us would even want it anyway.
I read that this chick gets an allowance. Really, though? An allowance? Back in my day (y’know, ‘80s baby) we called those chicks hoe strollers. Ok, you know what, that’s not right. They are two consenting adults and if they choose to hug up in public, good for them. If Poofy wants to trick his dough, that’s his business. Hey, at least he can afford to do it. Go ‘head Cassie for finding a personal piggy bank. Everyone could use one.
BUT: Just because he likes her doesn’t mean we have to. She has no talent. I mean, at least Total could hum a little and had dope material. What does Cassie have? A hot side-eye? Who cares.
All I’m saying is, Danity Kane better not miss their chance at scoring another platinum-selling album because this tone deaf chick who sings like a 12-year-old that just had her tonsils removed is the latest notch on Piffy Puff’s ever growing list of victims.
They have already gone gold, but the opportunity to go platinum is slipping as time passes by. Cassie couldn’t even go gold with her monster hit about blow jobs. It’s not right, ya'll.
All this time I was under the impression that the music industry suffered due to years of major labels offering consumers subpar music at outrageous prices while remaining oblivious to the technological advances made in digital music. But, thanks to JD, I now realize that the fall of the music industry is rooted in the publishing world’s choices in selecting magazine covers. Thank you, Master Splinter, for enlightening me.
Look, JD is a very accomplished music producer, writer, and businessman, but he needs his YouTube account canceled. Isn’t he like pushing 40? Are we really throwing temper tantrums about magazine covers? Is that what’s hot now? If 30 is the new 20, does that mean 40 is the new 10? If not, you could’ve fooled me.
Usher has a joint cover with one of the hottest producers out. Ok so? It’s not as if Usher’s label is not about to shove him down our throats for the rest of the year. It’s not like he’s not going to go above and beyond to say something out of pocket with the hopes of netting as many headlines as possible the way he always does, so what’s the problem?
I get that Usher is his friend, and I’d love someone to ride for me like that; but seriously, if he thinks a magazine cover is at the top of all the music industry’s ever growing list of ills, it’s no wonder Janet Jackson’s latest album is the new Frisbee.
To be fair, I will say that when Rolling Stone crowned Justin Timberpiss the King of Pop when Usher was outselling him by leaps and bounds, I was annoyed. Still, that to me isn’t a sign of why music is so terrible now. It just means many aging editors tend to not always get it.
In any event, I look forward to reading the Usher cover story penned by the homie, Clover Hope. After that, I’m going to take a long look at the Billboard Hot 100, then get mad over the real reason why the industry sucks so much these days.
Oh yeah, since we're on Usher, do read the Usher interview conducted by Queen to Be herself, Charreah Jackson for Essence.com. I wub her so very much. JD might stab her for calling Usher the Prince of Pop, though. Don't worry, Charreah, I got you.
I don't know what Usher's problem is, but he needs to get it together. Although I've always been annoyed by the degree to which he jacks his own ego off in interviews, he's always been consistent in his music and performances. But, if this is a preview of what lies ahead for the Here I Stand era, he might as well go back to making Similac for the new kid.
Normally Usher's running around the stage showing off his hookup at Bally's while doing his best Bobby Brown impression. Now look at him. He's walking around like a man who skipped just enough burgers to put on his little brother's tight shirt without stretching it. And his dancing? C'mon nah. For real, Urshur? Swaying side-to-side before busting into the old man's two step. Those are the same movies I could get out of my uncle if I toss him a Coors Lite. Thankfully he tried to sneak a little something in towards the end, but it seems like he needed to rest up before he decided to move at a rapid pace.
As for these tracks that have leaked lately: Those better not be on the album. In fact, they better not be even mastered. Although I liked "Love In This Club" for about three minutes, it's not very believable. You're not making love in the club, dude. You're shaving Tameka's legs. I understand he has to get his 'grown man' on, but grown man doesn't mean you turning into the R&B Pop-Pop.
C'mon Baby Ben Vereen. Are you going to let him play you? Look at him. Walking around looking like Fozzy Bear. I know you're going to keep your spot, right?
Look again, and tell me you're going to let him beat you down with his murse. I know you're not going to go out like that, so c'mon, Ush. Shave your beard (take that however you want) and get back at it. I know you can do it.
Poor Marche (Mar-shay, ya'll). All she wanted to do was throw on her dress, maybe hit the blunt, take a swig of that Patron + Koolaid and drop and give 'em fifty at her prom. Did they really have to arrest her?
If you haven't heard, a Houston teen was arrested after she reportedly kirked out on school officials denying her entrance into her senior prom and failing to give her a refund. Regardless of how I feel about her choice in prom dresses, if someone told me I couldn't enter my prom, then I would want my money back, too. I wouldn't be mad if she at least had someone sneak out some silverware for her to pawn.
I attended this high school, and words cannot capture just how proud I am at this very moment. We're getting national attention again, and not for something related to a certain now multi-millionaire football player. C'mon homie, we major! Sigh. By the time I graduated from Madison random pregnant girls walking around campus became the norm, so I can't say that I'm shocked about this.
Since we were often treated like we were graduating to cell block 8, I'm certain that she knew of the dress code in place, so with respect to the refund denial, this is all her bad.
The only thing that does get me is some of the comments I've read about her on various sites. Everyone is quick to call her a whore, stripper, ghetto this, hood that, etc. Ok, yeah, she's ghetto, but c'mon: These are the same styles promoted, validated, and glamorized in video and in print, so what do we expect of kids?
From the looks of her dress, while most people would liken her to a stripper, I'm almost certain in her eyes she was just trying to look like your typical celebrity.
I'm really not trying to excuse her behavior. I'm pretty sure she acted a true fool that night, was very disrespectful, and probably perpetuated every loud, ghetto, ign't stereotype there is. But I find it interesting that so many people are quick to call her a whore, but when Beyonce, Britney, and Rihanna do it, people almost deify them.
I'm conflicted, because on one end, she does look like she's headed for the pole as soon as the prom wraps up. But, most girls her age are more likely to be taught the value of weave than they are about the importance of self-worth, so what do we expect?
The list of the most popular baby names for 2007 has been released. For over three decades, Michael was the name of choice, but in recent years, my name has been removed from its well deserved top position. I don’t know why that is, but I suspect something sinister, twisted, and hater approved. That’s ok, though, because these days, with so many triflin’ kids running around acting like Dr. Suess sells crack, we don’t need anyone bad child soiling the great name of Michael.
Here’s the top ten baby names for boys:
1. Jacob
2. Michael
3. Ethan
4. Joshua
5. Daniel
6. Christopher
7. Anthony
8. William
9. Matthew
10. Andrew
I guess Jacob is OK, if you’re into that sort of thing (i.e. not naming your male child Michael).
For girls:
1. Emily
2. Isabella
3. Emma
4. Ava
5. Madison
6. Sophia
7. Olivia
8. Abigail
9. Hannah
10. Elizabeth
Yeah, a lot of these names are boring and common, so I can understand why some people would feel the need to create something special for their child to separate them from the pack. But, that doesn’t mean we need a bunch of Beyonce Ashanti’s and Quintisha’s running around either.
If you’re going to break the mold, try to heed the following rules:
1. Pay attention to phonics.
Some people walk around with names spelled like C’Belle and get mad that folks don’t know that your mama wants us to pronounce it the same way as Sybil.
2. Do not name your child after your favorite restaurant. Or your favorite meal. Or your favorite type of meat on sale. Labeefia ain’t cute, ya’ll. If you do any of the above, legally change your name to Obestia/Obesto.
3. Stop naming your children after cars. I know you like your Camry, but do you like that much? I don’t even knock you wanting your child to feel like they’re going to lead a Mercedes life despite you having a bus pass budget. Believe me: I feel you. But if you want to show that they’re top dollar kids, you might as well name them Chevron or Exxon. That’s where the real money is these days.
4. Stop trying to be creative. Especially when you know that you’re not. Just because you have problems paying your mortgage doesn’t mean some poor soul should walk around with a name like Mortagetta.
And stop listening to other people who will look you dead in the eye and tell you that Bontavia is a pretty name. And if you’re wondering, yes, that’s a real name. I do my research. (Sorry Bontavia)
5. Liquor is for consumption and possibly baby making, not baby naming. So yeah, I have made friends that were probably named after wine cooler flavors though the years, and while they are good people, HR doesn’t always know that.
Try to give your child a chance. I’ve already warned folks about sprinkling Lawry’s salt on their child’s resume on this blog before.
Then again, I like the name Malik for a boy, so if that ever comes to fruition (heaven help us if it does), I’m sure Matthew and Hannah will be giving my offspring the side eye thinking those scratches in the top corner of his resume come from a Black Power fist afro pick. But I bet Malik will get more love than Kolonick and Outkasta.
If you've ever watched an episode of The O'Reilly Factor, you already know Bill O'Reilly is not the nicest person in the world. I would say something harsher than that in depicting his character, but since I made a bet with someone today, you'll have to come up with your own selection of curse words to describe O'Reilly's personality.
As I was saying, despite knowing Bill O'Reilly is one of the grouchiest, meanest, shameless people in media, it doesn't hurt to have footage to back you up. I feel sorry for whatever poor soul had to deal with him everyday. Was it really that serious, Bill? I can only imagine how many times his coffee pot became the staff's urinal.
And someone please tell me that piece of hair Scotch-taped on Bill's head is from the Donald Trump Wig Collection.
I just don’t get it. I am Hillary Rodham Clinton. Just who do these people think they are to tell me that I am not going to be the Democratic nominee? I have amassed over 35 years of experience and in my 35 years of experience, I have never seen anyone with 35 years of experience be insulted this way. Just because someone loses a couple dozen states, runs their campaign finances into the ground, and has no foreseeable way of overtaking the lead of the other candidate – the candidate without 35 years of experience, I might add – does not mean they’ve lost. It just means they’re being tested. And really, you might as well call me scantron, because no one has been tested more than me.
Do people really expect me to drop out just because there’s no way I can be the nominee without pissing a couple million people off?
I’m Hillary Rodham Clinton, bitch.
Wait, wait: I don’t think they heard me.
I will be the nominee. Do you know what all I’ve put into this campaign? I’ve spent mine and Bill’s money. I’ve kissed babies. I’ve dodged fake sniper fire. I’ve pretended to like beer, hunting, and race cars.
I’ve even had to fight a coffee machine. What is with those things anyway? When I become president – and don’t you dare give me that look because I will be President – I’m banning those things. They’re sexist! If any woman tells you she can use it, she’s probably not a real woman. Just like the white people that have voted for Barack Obama aren’t real white people.
REAL American white people don’t live in Iowa, Colorado, Utah, Montana, Maine, North Dakota, Kansas, or Alaska. REAL, hardworking, blue collar, white Americans live in Pennsylvania, Ohio, and Michigan so long as Barack Obama’s name isn’t on any ballots during their time of residence. Duh. They will only vote for me. ME. ME. ME.
And do you want to know why?
Hahaha. Yeah, you know why. Two words: Jesse Jackson. That’s something I learned in my 35 years of experience.
Let’s get real: This is as close to the presidency as members of his constituency is ever going to get.
So really, isn’t it time we stop pretending to follow the rules – which my husband and people who now work on my campaign wrote anyway – and hand me the nomination that is rightfully mine, so I can start preparing my campaign against John McCain?
I’m sure a couple of states will be put off that I no longer consider them a part of the union because they didn’t vote for me, but we all have to be punished for our mistakes. Who still lives in Missouri and North Carolina anyway?
And yes, I realize a lot of African Americans will be angry that the first Black person with a “legitimate” chance at becoming President has to be told to accept my birthright and concede the race to me, but really, what will you all do? Not vote for a Democrat? Please.
If it helps, maybe I can get Bill to go on BET and do that little Superman dance Chelsea keeps telling me about. That should settle that.
Meanwhile, I’ll be on Univision with America Ferrara pandering to expanding my base.
I just want to say that I don’t hold any grudges. I understand the power of a great speech. But now is the time to get real and fall in line. I am the next President of the United States. Deal with it and perhaps I’ll let you keep your citizenship. Help me tell others to do the same.
After that, go to HillaryClinton.com and help me pay back myself.
I am Hillary Clinton and I approve of this message.
---
Dear Hillary,
You are lucky I don’t hit women or get shot by Secret Service, because I’ve been wanting to dropkick you for a couple of months now.
Oh that's right, you're a 'fighter.' Knuck if you buck, witch.
I used to like you, but now I’m considering donating to whoever runs against you when your Senate seat is up for reelection.
Yeah, I said it.
Let’s just face facts: You lost.
L.O.S.E.R.B.I.T.C.H.
Do you know what that mean? And before you even try to brand me a sexist, I’m a gender neutral bitch basher.
Your campaign is broke. No matter what happens in the next couple of contests, it’s not going to change the fact that there’s no way you can catch up with Obama in the delegate count and the popular vote. I avoid math like STDs and I still know that. Unless Reverend Wright drops a mixtape that offers some sort of diss track against white folk featuring Barack Obama, I don't see the superdelegates taking the risks of handing you the nomination.
Supporters and opponents alike maneuvered to get face time, whether it was 73-year-old Rep. James L. Oberstar (D-Minn.) patiently waiting his turn or Rep. Alcee L. Hastings (D-Fla.), a Clinton supporter, giving Obama a big hug.
Rep. Yvette Clarke (D-N.Y.) had the man autograph today's copy of the NY Daily News. (Cover: "It's his Party.") Reps. Charles B. Rangel (D-N.Y.), a Clinton backer, and Jesse Jackson Jr. (D-Ill.) gave him bear hugs on the floor, as well.
I know, I know. It hurts. I could call you Lawry's right now, couldn't I?
Even Republicans were star-struck. Rep. Illeana Ros-Lehtinen (R-Fla.) said she was escorting a group of elementary school students onto the House floor when Obama made his entrance.
Ros-Lehtinen said the children noticed the presidential hopeful and screamed, “It’s Barack Obama!” in unison. The congresswoman then led the students across the aisle and over to Obama, who chatted briefly with the three students.
“The kids were very excited,” said Ros-Lehtinen. “Like rock star excited.”
Speaking of kids, look what happens when children get around you:
Now look at them with Obama:
You are the mean old lady to kids, and you’re the crazy woman to us all.
And don’t be surprised if some of these “real Americans” you speak of turn on you. Indeed, there are some whites who will fall right into you and your husband’s race baiting antics, but not all. Some might even be offended at the suggestion that they will never vote for a Black man. But as a regular ole Scranton gal from Illinois, Arkansas, and New York (and who knows where else by June), one would assume you knew that.
If you had run a much more organized campaign, you would be the nominee. If you hadn’t been so divisive in your approach to campaigning, perhaps your negatives wouldn’t have reached all time highs and people would still tolerate you. But, because you decided to be yourself, you’ve reinforced every negative stereotype people had about you. And thank God for that. I knew you weren’t shit.
Look at you. Five dollars, Hill? You might as well hold your next fundraiser at the corner store.
You would think with “35 years of experience,” you would have learned to run a real presidential campaign. That’s what you get for underestimating Barack Obama and running an arrogant, incompetent, unorganized campaign.
It’s now time to go sit your silly ass down somewhere.
I'm holding out for the catfish and Moet affair myself.
It’s official: Usher has Mary J. Blige disease. All the signs were there. It started with the constant clamoring about how in love he was and how happy he finds himself because of it. Then the nuptials came, followed by the declaration that he is a brand new person. On a personal level, it’s pretty commendable. Musically, it makes for pretty dull and repetitive compositions. 
75,000 people hopped - including those on their boats - came to listen to Obama speak. It's exciting, yet kind of eerie, no?
Look again, and tell me you're going to let him beat you down with his murse. I know you're not going to go out like that, so c'mon, Ush. Shave your beard (take that however you want) and get back at it. I know you can do it.
Poor Marche (Mar-shay, ya'll). All she wanted to do was throw on her dress, maybe hit the blunt, take a swig of that Patron + Koolaid and drop and give 'em fifty at her prom. Did they really have to arrest her?
If you haven't heard, a Houston teen was arrested after she reportedly kirked out on school officials denying her entrance into her senior prom and failing to give her a refund. Regardless of how I feel about her choice in prom dresses, if someone told me I couldn't enter my prom, then I would want my money back, too. I wouldn't be mad if she at least had someone sneak out some silverware for her to pawn.
The only thing that does get me is some of the comments I've read about her on various sites. Everyone is quick to call her a whore, stripper, ghetto this, hood that, etc. Ok, yeah, she's ghetto, but c'mon: These are the same styles promoted, validated, and glamorized in video and in print, so what do we expect of kids?
